Part 5 - Day 11

Day 11 - Sunday August 2
Today was not such a good day. I woke up, still unable to hear, and although I keep trying to keep positive, I'm starting to feel less hopeful. I ate breakfast, took my 12 prednisone pills, and then thought about things I should do - pack the den, cut the lawn, purge items from the basement... instead, I laid on the couch. Watching tv is almost just annoying these days. I have learned to turn on the speakers that are on either side of the couch, and sit on the left side so that the one speaker is nice and loud in my good ear, but the sound still seems muffled. So I laid down in silence, just thinking. I think I must have laid there for about an hour, feeling sorry for myself, when my mom called. I have really been trying to be positive in front of her because I know how much of a worrier she is. I thought about not answering the phone, but she'd probably just worry more, so I picked it up. She offered to stop by with some granola for me (I'd left mine at her house a few weeks ago). She came by and found me sitting in silence, obviously not myself. I cried that morning in front of her. (sorry mom). I couldn't help it. It only lasted a few seconds, though, and then I snapped myself back into busy mode. She needed to use the computer, so I left her on it while I went up to my den and packed.
She left shortly after that, and I mowed my lawn, finished my packing of the den, and then decided to write this blog. I feel like I need to "talk" about my experience, but I don't want to get emotional and cry, which happens when I actually talk to someone about it... if that makes sense. This is somehow therapeutic, so even if nobody reads it, it is somehow helping me.
Later in the afternoon, my sister came by. We met my mom at Kelsey's for dinner. I've already figured out where to sit at restaurants so that I can hear the waitress as well as the people I'm with. A booth is best, and I like to sit on the right side, in the far end, so that my left ear is facing everyone. It's still very difficult to hear anything in busy places like restaurants, but if I watch people talking, I can make out most of what they say.
By the time I got home, my day that started out depressing had actually been productive. I packed my den, bough more packing tape, mowed the lawn, started the blog, and went to dinner. Not bad for a day that I thought would be spent feeling sorry for myself on the couch.
Monday will be the 4th day of prednisone. Only one day more of 12 pill dosage... I think for sure I'll start to hear something on Monday.